Rise of the Guardians of the Hearth

“You are the guardians of the hearth,” said President Gordon B. Hinckley, as he introduced “The Family: A Proclamation to the World” in the general Relief Society meeting in 1995. “You are the bearers of the children. You are they who nurture them and establish within them the habits of their lives. No other work reaches so close to divinity as does the nurturing of the sons and daughters of God.”

I think that mothers have come a long way. There was a time when mothers were chomping at the bit to get out of the house, and rush into the workplace, and away from their children and their prison-home. Often times they would flee the hearth out of a desire for self-fulfillment, self-discovery, or "something to do," rather than out of necessity. But I think there is a new "movement" of women who have witnessed the after-effects of such abandoning home and hearth desertions. There is a new generation of women who are fighting to "bring it back home." They are resuming position back at the battlefront. There is a new generation of "Guardians."  Mother-Warriors. Hearth-Heros. Lionesses at the Gate. And I am happy to now be one of those women. 

I was not always as passionate about staying home with children, as I am now. Actually, I was not passionate at all -- I was indifferent. (Which is a very dangerous thing to be!) 

Years ago, I had the chance to do things differently. I had the chance to flee the hearth, and I almost took it. 

When I was pregnant with my first child, I worked at a Child Development Center at Providence Hospital, in the infant room. My employers wanted me to stay there, and continue working after I gave birth. After 6 weeks postpartum, I would have been able to bring my baby with me into the infant room. I could have cared for her, along with many other babies, at the same time. I could have worked, and had my baby with me -- what could be better, right? 

I thought it was a great idea. 

We were poor. We were in the very beginning of college. We had nothing. We ate top ramen on a daily basis. We "needed" the money. I thought I should keep working, so we would not starve and die. I told my employer I was likely considering it. 

And then -- one fate-tipping day -- I sat pregnant and slurping my top ramen in the lunchroom (I know, really healthy). A girl that I worked with came and sat down next to me.  She took a deep breath, as if she had something important to say, but she was not sure how. She looked into my eyes and said to me, "Do not keep working. It is not worth it. You need to stay home with your baby, it is the only way." 

I was shocked. This girl was not a member of my faith, I barely knew her. But she was not messing around. She meant what she said. And she certainly said what she meant. I was perplexed. I was not expecting such a message to come from her. I nodded and smiled at her, and we chatted for a bit. But I kept her words with me, they had plunged deep into my heart, and I took them home to consider. 

I shared her powerful message with Charles, who favorably seconded her stay-at-home notion. He whole-heartedly, and 100% wanted me to stay home with our precious unborn baby, Sammi. He had hoped I would come around, and that I would see the wisdom and glory of the idea -- even though it made no sense financially. He knew we would survive, somehow. He wanted me to stay home, to full-time mother our children. And yet, he still left the decision up to me. Very wise. (Like forcing me to do something would work, ha!) 

So, after some internal-struggle, and many concerns (mostly about starving), and lots of prayer -- I chose to stay home with my precious first baby. After making that decision, I have been home with my children ever since - for 12 years now. 

Some of those years were insanely rough. But we did survive (and I mean survive!) without me working outside the home. Barely. Our days were spent with stress and worry over money, and our bowls were full of beans and rice. Charles ate goldfish crackers throughout the day, but no lunch. We managed an apartment building to reduce our rent, and add to our stress. We went without a car, in the winter, in Alaska. We did without, we used it up, and made do. We lived on hopes, and dreams, and love. 

It was not easy. 

Hope, dreams, and love . . . they do not fill the bank account. 

But when was the last time something worth doing was ever easy? Never. 

Our bank account was empty, but somehow we still survived. (Message on paying tithing/miracles for another day.) ;-) 

I am a stay-at-home mom. I am infinitely grateful to be so. Being home is a privilege, not a prison. It is not easy much of the time. But in my mind, it is the most worthwhile "work" I could ever do. This opinion may not be found true by everyone, but that is only because they have not caught the "vision" yet. I was there once, I know what it is like. To think all my current passion was once purely indifference. Funny how people can change. 

But all it took for me was one brave soul -- a courageous girl -- who sat me down and set me straight on the stay-at-home matter. I have never let go of that vision since that day. And I have been an avid mother-at-home warrior ever since I grasped the vision of at-home power. 

There is no amount of legislation, or lofty leaders, or laws, or programs, or schools, or government Band-Aids, that will heal this wounded world. There is only one power strong enough to really change things for good. And that power is Mothers. If every child had a loving mother (and father) the world would be a better place. No doubt about it. 

I do believe the time has come for the "Guardians of the Hearth" to rise and shine forth. You never know who you might influence for good. It was one girl -- not even a member of my faith -- who changed the course of my motherhood views, forever. Perhaps you can be that "one girl" for someone too. Sharing your light just might change the course of the very future. If it were not for that girl, my future, and my children's future, would be very different right now. Just think of it! 

As my beloved President Hinckley said: 

"God bless you, dear friends. Do not trade your birthright as a mother for some bauble of passing value. Let your first interest be in your home. The baby you hold in your arms will grow quickly as the sunrise and the sunset of the rushing days. I hope that when that occurs you will not be led to exclaim as did King Lear, “How sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is to have a thankless child!” (King Lear, I, iv, 312). Rather, I hope that you will have every reason to be proud concerning your children, to have love for them, to have faith in them, to see them grow in righteousness and virtue before the Lord, to see them become useful and productive members of society. If with all you have done there is an occasional failure, you can still say, “At least I did the very best of which I was capable. I tried as hard as I knew how. I let nothing stand in the way of my role as a mother.” Failures will be few under such circumstances." 

Rise, Guardians of the Hearth! 

Your time for battle has come!