day-to-day

Life has become very day-to-day, lately. But I suppose that is the nature of giving up the long, care-free, summer days, and embracing the season of school. 

But even beyond the mental switch from summer, to school -- I have been trying to take life one day at a time. 

Sometimes I try to see too far into the future. I try to plan, to dream, etc., and I can often forget the day. THIS day. Today. It can be hard for me to live in the moment. It is a challenge for me, it really is! I often find myself anxious, antsy, restless . . . looking forward to the future. 

I often think (and I am just being honest), that I will be happy when... (fill in the blank). 

But that is a bunch of hooey. Because I need to enjoy the now. Because now is all I have. This day -- and all my days already gone by -- are the totality of my life. And those days, months, years, have all gone by in a flash. Time has gone by so quickly...

Especially as a Mother. 

I had a realization moment last week. I was cooking dinner, William was sitting on the counter next to me reading his homework, I was shoveling food into Henry's mouth,  Daniel was playing the trumpet, and Sammi was asking Junior High homework questions. I realized, in that moment, I was no longer an amateur. I had become -- over the process of time -- a  REAL MOM. 

Right now I feel like "Motherhood 101" is over, and I have been thrust into the next level of classes. The simple days are over. The "basics" have been learned. And I have found myself in the thick of very thick things. I am a "mature" Mother. A grown-up mother! I am a 33 year old woman, with 4 children. And that is how people see me now. When the heck did that happen? 

Sometimes I think back on the simple times of "Motherhood 101", and I have to smile at how quiet those days really were. I thought I was so busy then. I thought I was stretched to my limits. But looking back, life was so simple, and so sweet. And I am grateful for that time now. 

When I had my first child, Sammi, the internet was very limited, and not what it is now -- so that was much less of a distraction. I read a lot. I had time to just watch Sammi discover her world, every moment of her childhood was captured by my eyes. I was always there, watching, playing, exploring with her. We would build blocks, and color, and read, and do everything together. I used to take the time to create the entirety of Disneyland out of little people. Sammi would dress-up like a princess, and I would actually sit with her and watch Strawberry Shortcake. She really got the best of my time. She was the 1st, and that makes her extremely lucky. (Poor Henry, baby number 4, with 3 older siblings chasing him around, and vying for his time, and my attention.) 

As I sit and reflect, I realize the time I wished away then -- those simple, quiet days -- they are gone. Never to return. So why in the world did I wish those days away? Stupid me! 

Why in the world do I ever wish these days away??

It is madness! It is folly! 

When people say, "Enjoy your babies, they grow-up so fast!" They are not joking! 

Sammi went from this . . . 

To this. While I blinked. 

Daniel went from this . . . 

To this. In just seconds. 

William went from this . . . 

To this. Faster than I could have dreamed.

And Henry went from this . . . 

To this. In the speed of light! 

My family went from this . . . 

 To this. Before I could catch my breath! 

Time keeps on slipping into the future. 

One day at a time, people. Take it one day at a time. And ENJOY it! 

"Don't wish your days away, wishing for better days ahead!" - Marjorie Hinckley 

It is the day-to-day that counts!