Invisible

Do you ever have days where you feel like Violet from The Incredibles -- days where you just want to be invisible? Maybe you don't, but I do. And last Sunday was one of those days. After a long week of worry about Henry, and struggling with lower back pain, and lots on my mind, I was ready to just kick-back and relax at church, with no worries. I am still calling-less, and carefree!

But my mental invisibility cloak failed me. I was methodically twirling my hair while sitting in Sunday school, daydreaming during the lesson (as I normally do), when I heard my name called, "Sister van Ormer, would you come up here for a moment?" Ripped from my daydream, I obediently stood up and walked to the front of the chapel, which was full of our charming congregation starring right at me. "Sister van Ormer, do you mind if I ask you a few questions? Here, have a seat, and use the microphone," requested our Sunday School teacher, with a very soothing voice, that I could not resist. "Fantastic." I believe was my sarcastic response. I took my uncomfortable seat smack dab in front of everyone who had just ripped away my security cloak.

Invisibility? Not this Sunday.

I sat at the front of the chapel, with all eyes on me. Eyes that were searching, curious what words of wisdom I might bestow upon them after having been plucked from the audience, unaware. I shifted in my seat, trying to understand how I had physically moved from my comfortable bench, to the hard plastic chair I was spotlighted in. Then the teacher very calmly asked me some questions about paying tithing. (Thank goodness it was something I knew a little about!) I was asked questions like, "How does paying tithing show your love for the Lord?" and "Why do some people choose not to pay their tithing?" and "Would you be afraid not to pay your tithing?"

Knock, knock, anybody there?

I just felt so weird being in front of everyone unexpectedly that I have no idea what I even said as a blabbered away, while twisting the microphone cord in my hand to soothe my nerves. (Though I honestly felt strangely at peace. I did not have time to be really nervous, I guess!) I do know I tried to share my testimony of tithing, and why I feel so strongly about paying it, faithfully. I used a few personal examples from my own life, that I luckily had experienced to pull from. But I still felt silly sitting there in the hot-seat in front of the chapel. Sheepish, that is a good word to describe it. Don't get me wrong . . . I love teaching, speaking, and sharing my testimony -- if I am prepared. But put me on the spot, rip me from my wandering thoughts, and La-La Land, and I can be in trouble!

I just hope I said something that made even a smidgen of sense. I tried, boy golly, I tried.

After I was grilled, Charles was called up to answer some questions. I much preferred to listen to him.

So much for kicking-back and relaxing at church. I think I need to fortify that invisibility cloak of mine!